Quotes for Vietnam Special, again, feel free, ya da ya da ya da

Richard Hammond

(While fixing his galleon) Do you have a pencil I can borrow?

(Guessing a question in English, instead of Vietnamese) Always give way to the car from the right!

James May

That rain makes a really annoying noise on my colander-- helmet. And it comes through.

Jeremy Clarkson

(In the rain, getting wet) Sell me your car! Please!

I am the most miserable human being alive! Where's this restaurant?! Where is it?!

(After a girl spray paints someone's bike) Everything in the entire carpark needs painted pink! (snickers)

(After Hammond hits the side of his bike, knocking a mirror off) You knocked one of my mirrors off!


James overtakes Jeremy and begins to sing The Beach Boys' "Little Honda"

James: #I'll take you anywhere you want to go, I'll ride my Honda tonight-#

Jeremy: I hate you!

James: (he just ignores him) #First gear, it's all right. Second gear, I lean right. Third gear, hold on tight#

Jeremy: (voiceover) All we could hope for was that Captain Beach Boy would have a disaster on these awful, flooded roads.

Amphibious Bike

James: #It's not a big motorcycle, just a groovy little motorbike, it's more fun than a barrel of monkeys, that two-wheeled bike...#

Rudely cut to Hammond and Clarkson, stuck in a cave.

Defaced Helmet

Jeremy: I fear my new mod look has been spoiled slightly, because somebody has written 'penis' on my helmet!

Richard: I did that.

Top Gear's Amphibious Tradition, Involving James

Jeremy: (after James crashes into his waterbike) Go away!

James: I'm trying!

Jeremy: Why are you doing this to me?! It's that way, you blithering idiot!

James: (after crashing into some netting) Oh, bloody hell!

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